Wow.

I haven't been here in years. Being that my family parents, my husband, and I all have different opinions and views on what's really going on in the world, regarding Covid-19 aka coronavirus, I felt like I needed a place to put my thoughts.

Cut to the chase - I AM WORRIED. I AM SCARED. I 100% BELIEVE THIS IS REAL AND NOT BLOWN OUT OF PROPORTION. I don't think people are taking this seriously enough and aren't being socially responsible. Trust me when I say, I do not want to be right. I want to be wrong. My husband and parents feel like this is a big overreaction and I disagree. This is especially hard with children, regardless of whether it effects them severely or not. I am worried for my parents, my grandma, my in-laws, anyone at risk. Also, I don't ever want to be sick... even with a cold!

I have generalized anxiety as it is. It might sound crazy but my mind has gone over doomsday scenarios just because. My mind has gone to places like war, pandemic, natural disaster, and even "one of my children will drown if they go camping with my parents and I'm not there." That's not to knock them or their care of the boys, it's simply where my mind goes. It's a crazy, sad place to be in your mind.

I've been making the mistake of reading Facebook after Greg has fallen asleep. Nothing on there reassures me, only makes me more nervous, anxious, and nauseated. [Side note - a little over a year ago I decided to take a "break" from Facebook. After a few months I put the app back on my phone. Then I started reading posts again and comments/liking. I still haven't posted anything. I can't. I cannot add to the mass amounts of misinformation that's floating around.] I'm so tired of seeing people repost text from who-knows-where on the internet... a friend of a friend etc. Unless you're posting a news article, a link, anything, give it some context, provide a reference, because copying and pasting things you don't know to be true or accurate is only hurting those that read it.

I don't know where I'm going with this other than to say and acknowledge that I'm worried and scared, because my husband and family don't want to hear what I'm worried about and they don't want to hear me talk about it anymore.